Everything listed here is the real deal, the gen-yoo-ine article -- mine,
start to finish. (Please feel free to link to these pages; however, don't
copy them for your own website.)
- "Spent my [three] years prostrate to the higher mind, got my paper,
and I was free." (-- the Indigo Girls, "Closer To Fine") And I
worked out some cynicism along the way, too, in "The
Essay Throughout Your Life."
- Who says you can't learn anything from cable
- There are some archetypes that transcend boundaries and become
mythology. Dragons are one of them; evil admins are another. See the two
combined in the original adventures of the Bastard
Knight From Hell!
- If you've played real-time strategy games (like Warcraft, Starcraft,
Command & Conquer, etc., etc.) for any length of time, you'll have
noticed just how similar they feel after a while. And yet nobody seems to
want to program the RTS innovations I suggest.
Life is cruel that way.
Just like everyone else on the Internet, I receive forwarded humor from my
friends. Sometimes, these pieces are actual gems of hilarity. (I have
high-quality friends.) Here is a limited selection -- of only forwarded
humor whose original author I haven't been able to verify (otherwise, I
will provide a link to the original author's page) -- of other people's
jokes that I've found to be worth the retelling.
- You think screaming customers are bad ...? Well, have you ever had
to put a vampire on hold, or keep the demon on the phone from claiming
your soul while you're helping him? Obviously, you've never worked Undead Tech Support.
- "Thus caution doth make house cats of us all ..." Anyone who's ever
been owned by a cat will recognize the dilemma expressed in Hamlet's Cat's soliloquy.
- Speaking of Hamlet, take a look at a recently discovered folio
edition of the play, in which Shakespeare rewrote the ending so that Hamlet meets Scooby
Doo. (By Michael S. Schiffer. Link goes offsite.)
- Ever been confronted with somebody so astoundingly clueless that
they need a whappy stick upside the head, but you don't want to waste
any more precious minutes of your life on them? Just fill out the Standardized Bonehead Reply Form.