Evaluating Health Claims of Sobe Beverages: A Case Study
In one of my journal entries, I griped about the presence of caffeine in Sobe Power, a fruit drink billed as being "healthy refreshment" and "all natural". In fact, for individuals with a history of heart fibrillation -- my dad ended up in the emergency room and almost died several years ago from the physiological effects of being served caffeinated coffee instead of the decaf he requested -- calling caffeinated fruit juice a "health beverage" can be like calling a shotgun to the head an "assisted living plan" for retirees. But this got me thinking. On the whole, is Sobe actually healthier or more natural than the average fruit drink?
For my study, I grabbed the following comparison cases: a can of "Fruit Integration" Fruitopia from the cafeteria refrigerator; a can of Minute Maid "100% juice with added natural flavors ORANGE BLEND from concentrate" (henceforth referred to as "Orange Juice"); a long-unopened bottle of Gatorade brand "TORQ Energy Juice Drink" from the back recesses of the fridge; and 12 ounces of slightly fruity-tasting tap water. Will Sobe emerge the winner from this pack of competitors?
Sobe Power | Fruitopia | "Torq" | "Orange Juice" | Water | SOBE'S RANK: | |
Taste | Almost tolerable | Wretched | Motor oil * | Fruity | Pleasant | 3 |
Weirdest Additive | "Taurine" | Sodium benzoate | "Cochineal extract" | Lemon juice | None | 4 |
Is It Natural? | Questionable | No | No | Yes | Yes | 3 |
Fruitiness (number of items on ingedients list before reaching a fruit juice product) | 3 | 2 | 4 | 1 | N/A | 3 |
Sodium (mg) | 8 | 120 | 200 | 40 | trace | 2 |
Sugars (g) | 47 | 43 | 32 | 40 | trace | 5 |
Scariness (because stress is a health issue too) | Definitely unsettling ** | Kinda worrisome | Too scary to open | Only vaguely | Not at all | 4 |
Presence of caffeine | Yes | No | No | No | No | 5 |
Slogan | "Specially formulated to uplift the mind, body and spirit" | "Fruit with the urge to merge" | "Energy with staying power" | "From concentrate" | "Water" | 1 |
OVERALL | 3rd (tie): Spotty all-around performance. | 3rd (tie): Not bad for "red cola." | 4th: Would you open this bottle? | 2nd: Well-bodied, good bouquet, subtle aftertaste. | 1st: The perfect health drink. |
Conclusion
Healthy? Bah. Sobe ended up in a dead heat for 3rd place with a drink consisting mostly of processed sugar. I should take some consolation in the fact that Sobe outscored "Torq" despite its caffeine and dubious nutritional statistics.
Footnotes
* I was too timid to
open the bottle. This is just a guess.
** The little blurb
on the underside of the cap said "The Other White Meat." I rest my case.
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